So, not that long ago, I stumbled on a Korean drama series called Death's Game. It is about a young man, who fails to find material success which prevents him from romantic success and then he kills himself over his failure. The premise of the show is that death then punishes him by making him die ten more deaths each of which reveals something about himself and his life and causes him to cherish it and thus regret his suicide. Anyway, it is actually very good. I bring it up in this context because apparently large numbers of these 'tiger children' are finding their life extraordinarily unfulfilling and ending them.
I am acquisitive and jealous over material things, over success as a writer, over domestic bliss when my marriage and family seems to be a constant struggle. It seems like other people have it so much better. But I'm not sure that the way it seems is really true. Maybe, it is not better just different? People that we are envious of are blowing their brains all over the pavement and drinking themselves into oblivion, etc. etc. Probably time to reevaluate.
The grass is definitely always greener, as the saying goes. I understand that but also sometimes wonder what would be like to trade other people’s problems for my own, even just for a week or two.
The best antidote to this is, of course, gratitude.
And that show sounds very interesting. You know, all of my Asian friends, to a man and woman, described their parents’ style as “tyrannical.” Yet they’re materially successful and sure seem happy with their lives. So I still somewhat stand by my original contention that I think Asians, at least in America, are doing something right.
I am more jealous of their talent than I am their success. I mean, I sometimes wish that I 'had a better life' but more often than that I wish that I was a skilled musician or had more personal discipline or that sort of thing. They are definitely making more accomplished children. But they aren't at all grateful for what their parents are doing for/to them. Does that put the failure with the parents or the children?
The toughest part of my materialist habit to shake is when I think about my kids' future. I want them to be spiritually successful, but also materialistically successful. I like to think I'd take the spiritual success over the materialistic success, but the latter is more easily defined and measured. Here's hoping I mature enough to make my children's relationship with God the top priority.
That’s a great articulation of the same problem I feel. It’s especially acute in the merchant empire we call America, which was based not on the idea of obscene to God, but obedience to commerce. All the Founders’ God talk, to me, was both a product of the times and intended for the masses to keep them in line. Would they they really did set up an explicitly Christian nation.
Anyway, back to your point: would I want my kids spiritually sound but materially struggling? Honestly, no. Nor would I want them rich but godless. If I HAD to choose one, I like to think I’d pick the former, but I don’t know if I’d consign my own children to a life of poverty.
Every man’s plight is unique. respect you called out Mr. PMC and thanks for defining the acronym, but it’s true, one man’s existential crisis is another man’s desire. Something like that. And every investment has a cost and a risk: some pay off better than others, or in different ways
They do. I do think this young man’s plight is far more fixable than if he were poor. I vehemently dispute the idea that it’s easy to be upwardly mobile in America based on “grit” or whatever.
Yeah, I tend to agree. And the networking “language” and skills can be kind of an elite club, often only accessible through certain fields and certain colleges, and otherwise hard to break into.
I wish I can say "te absolvo", but I'm really not one to talk. When I first saw your note, my initial reaction was to push back because I thought you were being needlessly mean. But instead I overthink things, and I ended up giving that note a like. Thankfully someone was there to do what I have failed to do.
I remember you putting out the note. I also commented under that something like yours. You're right. Can't deny the truth in this.
Also, I still don't think I should repent. Met too many coddled souls like this. There's always an excuse for everything and too many talk. My qoutes might be not as profound as yours, but I think they frame my message clear.
"Anxiety arises from inaction." and "Help yourself and God will help you too."
During the years I recognized, that being nice is not necessariliy the best road. Me being bullyish won't mean that I have anything against the kid. He has some things going for him, most of us came from much deeper. Don't let it go to waste. If he comes out as a better, happier man, it's a positive for everyone. Good luck, you'll(he) be needing it.
So just as I said...you're right...but I still don't think that I'm wrong.
So, not that long ago, I stumbled on a Korean drama series called Death's Game. It is about a young man, who fails to find material success which prevents him from romantic success and then he kills himself over his failure. The premise of the show is that death then punishes him by making him die ten more deaths each of which reveals something about himself and his life and causes him to cherish it and thus regret his suicide. Anyway, it is actually very good. I bring it up in this context because apparently large numbers of these 'tiger children' are finding their life extraordinarily unfulfilling and ending them.
I am acquisitive and jealous over material things, over success as a writer, over domestic bliss when my marriage and family seems to be a constant struggle. It seems like other people have it so much better. But I'm not sure that the way it seems is really true. Maybe, it is not better just different? People that we are envious of are blowing their brains all over the pavement and drinking themselves into oblivion, etc. etc. Probably time to reevaluate.
BTW great quote from Abbot Varobiev
The grass is definitely always greener, as the saying goes. I understand that but also sometimes wonder what would be like to trade other people’s problems for my own, even just for a week or two.
The best antidote to this is, of course, gratitude.
And that show sounds very interesting. You know, all of my Asian friends, to a man and woman, described their parents’ style as “tyrannical.” Yet they’re materially successful and sure seem happy with their lives. So I still somewhat stand by my original contention that I think Asians, at least in America, are doing something right.
I am more jealous of their talent than I am their success. I mean, I sometimes wish that I 'had a better life' but more often than that I wish that I was a skilled musician or had more personal discipline or that sort of thing. They are definitely making more accomplished children. But they aren't at all grateful for what their parents are doing for/to them. Does that put the failure with the parents or the children?
The toughest part of my materialist habit to shake is when I think about my kids' future. I want them to be spiritually successful, but also materialistically successful. I like to think I'd take the spiritual success over the materialistic success, but the latter is more easily defined and measured. Here's hoping I mature enough to make my children's relationship with God the top priority.
That’s a great articulation of the same problem I feel. It’s especially acute in the merchant empire we call America, which was based not on the idea of obscene to God, but obedience to commerce. All the Founders’ God talk, to me, was both a product of the times and intended for the masses to keep them in line. Would they they really did set up an explicitly Christian nation.
Anyway, back to your point: would I want my kids spiritually sound but materially struggling? Honestly, no. Nor would I want them rich but godless. If I HAD to choose one, I like to think I’d pick the former, but I don’t know if I’d consign my own children to a life of poverty.
Every man’s plight is unique. respect you called out Mr. PMC and thanks for defining the acronym, but it’s true, one man’s existential crisis is another man’s desire. Something like that. And every investment has a cost and a risk: some pay off better than others, or in different ways
They do. I do think this young man’s plight is far more fixable than if he were poor. I vehemently dispute the idea that it’s easy to be upwardly mobile in America based on “grit” or whatever.
Yeah, I tend to agree. And the networking “language” and skills can be kind of an elite club, often only accessible through certain fields and certain colleges, and otherwise hard to break into.
Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea culpa.
Thanks for writing this
Thank you for reading.
I wish I can say "te absolvo", but I'm really not one to talk. When I first saw your note, my initial reaction was to push back because I thought you were being needlessly mean. But instead I overthink things, and I ended up giving that note a like. Thankfully someone was there to do what I have failed to do.
Yeah I agree. I was being obnoxious and uncharitable. Wasn’t the first time and it won’t be the last.
I heard Private Military Contractor, heh.
That works too.
I remember you putting out the note. I also commented under that something like yours. You're right. Can't deny the truth in this.
Also, I still don't think I should repent. Met too many coddled souls like this. There's always an excuse for everything and too many talk. My qoutes might be not as profound as yours, but I think they frame my message clear.
"Anxiety arises from inaction." and "Help yourself and God will help you too."
During the years I recognized, that being nice is not necessariliy the best road. Me being bullyish won't mean that I have anything against the kid. He has some things going for him, most of us came from much deeper. Don't let it go to waste. If he comes out as a better, happier man, it's a positive for everyone. Good luck, you'll(he) be needing it.
So just as I said...you're right...but I still don't think that I'm wrong.
That’s fair man. It’s a tricky issue. I definitely could have expressed myself without being so internetty about it.