Thank you. I really feel this: "Something is wrong when I feel more satisfaction and a greater sense of accomplishment after mowing the lawn or cleaning my kitchen than I do from my actual day job where I spend 95 percent of my time."
I find your honesty and candor about your dissatisfaction with life and our Garbage System to be extremely refreshing. I am sick of reading work by people who pretend Everything is Just Peachy, and Getting Better. There is no hope for improvement, no hope for a better world, if we keep pretending Garbage World is OK and don't call it out.
I love literature and reading probably more than anything else. I didn't pursue a career in the arts because I'm a coward; I didn't think I was good enough and I wanted to be safe and financially secure. We all make these hard decisions and at midlife they tend to come back and haunt us.
They do come back to haunt us at midlife, because now we know that it IS too late and we’ve been lied to by so many for so long about so much. I don’t understand why. I try to be as candid as possible with my kids.
No brother, it isn’t cowardice. Don’t let that bastardised, fucked up, totally out of whack economic reality of your country make you feel like a coward. The economic reality is like the abuser, the manipulator, the raging alcoholic, violent parent.
We don’t typically refer to the victims in those situations as cowards...,
And, you’re now doing it, right? Small scale, but who gives a fuck. The rather dedicated BKS Iyengar said (maybe he was lifting it from somewhere else, as Alex says, memory is a funny thing. Especially mine)
“Work alone is the privilege, not the fruits thereof”
Don’t let the incoming or lack of incoming $ put a value on yourself or the work. Or anything like that.
If only i could listen to my own advice..... i feel that every day too. I made similar choices.
Right on. We do what we have to do for those we love. It doesn’t always feel good, and it’s not always our preferred choice, but that doesn’t make it bad.
"Something is wrong when I feel more satisfaction and a greater sense of accomplishment after mowing the lawn or cleaning my kitchen than I do from my actual day job where I spend 95 percent of my time."
Ah, my reason for choosing housewifery, where I'm told I'm a) oppressed b) stupid c) a non-contributing member of society, meanwhile a) I got to watch all my kids' firsts and not some daycare worker who doesn't give a shit about my kids, while I give up half my paycheck to them b) women in the workplace is the biggest societal scam (this enrages people when I point to decreased wages/increased taxes since women entered the workforce en masse and they sputter and spew more npc shit like "feminism is about choice!!!" while still also judging me for my choice) c) very proud to not be a contributing member of society.
Good for you! I catch flak sometimes, but I also think forcing women into the workplace has been a disaster for humankind. Yes, FORCED, in the form of a massive increase in the cost of living and a concomitant stagnation of wages.
There are so, so many other problems with life in America—and Canada—that to list them all would hijack the purpose of this post. Suffice it to say, you sound happy with your choice despite the people saying “feminism is all about CHOICES” telling you your choice is bad. Progress!
Great post. I think a lot about aesthetics, especially after reading C.S. Lewis's "Abolition of Man," and I think our culture's aesthetic sense is so damaged that we're collectively incapable of even recognizing art. It makes sense that our metric is profit. We're only capable of viewing things in terms of utility. This is also why I think that Catholics and Orthodox have an advantage in navigating a way through the modern hellscape that is our culture. Something about the Liturgy and the Mass is intrinsically artful and draws us closer to something outside of ourselves, something Higher.
Mass culture has created mass art, and instead of delivering art that edifies the human spirit to as wide an audience as possible, it’s resulted in the elevation of the most debased slop intended to tickle people on a glandular level and encourage them to consume. It’s the race to the bottom all those horrible people warned us about. They’re still horrible people, and their remedies are bad, but when you’re right, you’re right.
Thank you. I really feel this: "Something is wrong when I feel more satisfaction and a greater sense of accomplishment after mowing the lawn or cleaning my kitchen than I do from my actual day job where I spend 95 percent of my time."
I find your honesty and candor about your dissatisfaction with life and our Garbage System to be extremely refreshing. I am sick of reading work by people who pretend Everything is Just Peachy, and Getting Better. There is no hope for improvement, no hope for a better world, if we keep pretending Garbage World is OK and don't call it out.
I love literature and reading probably more than anything else. I didn't pursue a career in the arts because I'm a coward; I didn't think I was good enough and I wanted to be safe and financially secure. We all make these hard decisions and at midlife they tend to come back and haunt us.
They do come back to haunt us at midlife, because now we know that it IS too late and we’ve been lied to by so many for so long about so much. I don’t understand why. I try to be as candid as possible with my kids.
No brother, it isn’t cowardice. Don’t let that bastardised, fucked up, totally out of whack economic reality of your country make you feel like a coward. The economic reality is like the abuser, the manipulator, the raging alcoholic, violent parent.
We don’t typically refer to the victims in those situations as cowards...,
And, you’re now doing it, right? Small scale, but who gives a fuck. The rather dedicated BKS Iyengar said (maybe he was lifting it from somewhere else, as Alex says, memory is a funny thing. Especially mine)
“Work alone is the privilege, not the fruits thereof”
Don’t let the incoming or lack of incoming $ put a value on yourself or the work. Or anything like that.
If only i could listen to my own advice..... i feel that every day too. I made similar choices.
Right on. We do what we have to do for those we love. It doesn’t always feel good, and it’s not always our preferred choice, but that doesn’t make it bad.
"Something is wrong when I feel more satisfaction and a greater sense of accomplishment after mowing the lawn or cleaning my kitchen than I do from my actual day job where I spend 95 percent of my time."
Ah, my reason for choosing housewifery, where I'm told I'm a) oppressed b) stupid c) a non-contributing member of society, meanwhile a) I got to watch all my kids' firsts and not some daycare worker who doesn't give a shit about my kids, while I give up half my paycheck to them b) women in the workplace is the biggest societal scam (this enrages people when I point to decreased wages/increased taxes since women entered the workforce en masse and they sputter and spew more npc shit like "feminism is about choice!!!" while still also judging me for my choice) c) very proud to not be a contributing member of society.
Good for you! I catch flak sometimes, but I also think forcing women into the workplace has been a disaster for humankind. Yes, FORCED, in the form of a massive increase in the cost of living and a concomitant stagnation of wages.
There are so, so many other problems with life in America—and Canada—that to list them all would hijack the purpose of this post. Suffice it to say, you sound happy with your choice despite the people saying “feminism is all about CHOICES” telling you your choice is bad. Progress!
"We would all be happier if we lived authentically! ... NOOO NOT LIKE THAT!!"
Hahahahahaha!
“You have a FALSE CONSCIOUSNESS . . . if you don’t agree with my politics.”
It’s unhealthy how much I hate these people.
Channel that hate into creative output, easier said than done but at least it doesn't ferment in the gut.
Great post. I think a lot about aesthetics, especially after reading C.S. Lewis's "Abolition of Man," and I think our culture's aesthetic sense is so damaged that we're collectively incapable of even recognizing art. It makes sense that our metric is profit. We're only capable of viewing things in terms of utility. This is also why I think that Catholics and Orthodox have an advantage in navigating a way through the modern hellscape that is our culture. Something about the Liturgy and the Mass is intrinsically artful and draws us closer to something outside of ourselves, something Higher.
Having a beautiful liturgy does help.
Mass culture has created mass art, and instead of delivering art that edifies the human spirit to as wide an audience as possible, it’s resulted in the elevation of the most debased slop intended to tickle people on a glandular level and encourage them to consume. It’s the race to the bottom all those horrible people warned us about. They’re still horrible people, and their remedies are bad, but when you’re right, you’re right.
Hello from a fellow lawyer, who would rather be a writer.
My brotherman 🤝